Every child you are lucky enough to father, mother is such a privledge, gift and in small Maine towns, the entire village helps raise those kids.
You pitch in with school projects, community events and families are strong. Local Maine teachers offer support during tough times too beyond reading, writing, arithmetic. Wrapping arms around a small child, providing hugs, a rocking chair closeness for a little one. To just listen, care about the child’s troubles, confusion. Teachers can help kids way way beyond just guiding the classroom educational lesson plans.
Mainers stay involved with the raising of those kids from the time they are knee high to a grasshopper. To when your grocery bill swells to high three digits when they and their sporting buddies, classmates all make a home loud with laughter, conversation.
Unfortunately when schools in large urban, city areas become more like factories, kids can be herded through without the individual attention that smaller classes create. Had a Philadelphia teacher who wants to move his five kids to Maine describe the gangs, metal detectors, wall to wall students squeezed in concrete detention centers, more like prison settings with drug dogs, police full time roaming the halls. That is not the way it is in Maine, the 4th lowest crime state.
Societal pressures to standardize and dehumanize can squeeze the life out of individual spark that is unique in all children.
Harry Chapin wrote songs, sang about many things “of the world” that happen that hurt all of us. Like why the color of the flowers have to, must be always red.
Flowers come in a slew of colors and wild flowers of Maine are my favorite. Like the images of Maine lupines, or the stain glass colors and shapes artisans pick to create one of a kind creations. Enjoy the natural beauty of the many neat people God brings in and out of your life. Let some of them rub off on your and vice versa. Don’t expect them to be your twin, a clone.
Let kids pick their own colors, and as adults, never lose your unique personality that makes you radiate, work together for the common good like a stained glass window.
We all have a unique purpose in life. Breath, relax, find your talents, true colors, and be a servant to others. You and I are all originals. The only one. Let your special light shine. Teach kids to do the same.
Maine, we keep it simple, we know who we are, why we are here.
Maine Loons Fishing, Bobbing, Letting The Current Drift Take Them Where It Will.
Today a dusting of crunchy snow squashed under foot as rain mixed with ice added to the early morning walk experience.
Creating a new dimension as like the mailman, who does not only deliver on warm, sunshine rich days, I hoofed it to where the Meduxnekeag River starts from its headwaters at Drews Lake.
The turn around started the return trip after sitting on a square piece of granite rock and listening, watching the dam water churn life reflections. The rain on my face, sound of ice pellets patter, splatter on my jacket mixed in reminded me of picking potatoes as a kid. When the dark clouds overhead burst open. And grabbing, rounding up in a hurry my water jug, sweatshirt and lunch pail. Blue streaking, racing for the covered pickup body at the end of the spud field. Rained out for the day, heading home soggy, wet like a river rat.
Storms in your life happen.
Get stronger, don’t expect it to get easier. Some inclement weather just needs your strength to accept, to just persevere to get through it. Do the best you can and help others in the same boat hang on until calmer weather. Growing up on a Maine potato farm and being up against it, worrying about hanging on to that farm taught me a lot early in life.
Be grateful for what you have, don’t want for anything you don’t need.
Embrace struggles and squeeze all the wisdom, understanding you can from them. Make good come out of them. Consider it all joy. Remember watching your parents do the same. Learn from, remember their lessons.
Living Waters Youth Bible Summer Camp is located on the shores of Grand Lake, near Butterfield Landing, in the Dark and MacAllister Cove region. The Hodgdon ME Baptist church has taken on a mission project to help Living Waters replace, enlarge a waterfront storage building for kayak, canoe paddles, life jackets, other equipment. And to scrape, stain several lake view cabins that have been waiting patiently for a drink of a new protective finish. To raise money for the worthwhile project, the Lunn family performed a concert.
Last night the Cary, East Hodgdon ME Baptist churches were invited to the variety of inspirational, moving music and fed in more than one way.
With food and fellowship after the performance of all three congregations. As I watched, enjoyed the talented family and Barrett Quint’s expert job with accompanying audio visual imagery, my eyes watered.
I felt so grateful through the uplifting songs. So ashamed and broken through the ones of sorrow and pain. There is something very positive happening in my life. I used to feel contained, too busy, racing and was missing cues because of too much on my plate. Examine your excuses, admit your mistakes and don’t keep making them. Others do the same thing when you come up for air, look around.
Since the kids are raised, out of the house for the first summer in twenty three years, I have more time to dedicate to areas of my life that have not gotten the attention they deserved. Oh sure, taught Sunday school, had gotten the family to church growing up, but a deeper personal relationship with the Lord, more time on my knees did not seem available between being self employed, a single parent and struggling to be a better mate in a relationship that I seemed to be three steps behind on most of the time.
As I watched the Lunn family perform with such ease, polish and sincere joy in their gift of a music ministry, I remember my home growing up being filled with music.
Mom who was a church piano player, organist playing Rock of Ages, In The Garden, Amazing Grace, Church of the Wildwood. There is nothing like walking in to the home as a kid and hearing church music filling the home. And fresh warm cookies. My Mom was in the home, worked together with her family, husband on the Maine farm.
The sound of singing full of joy or sorrow depending on the song. Those songs now are like old familiar friends because I grew up with them in the foreground and background. Of church services, funerals, holidays, worship experiences. And filling the Maine farm home.
I feel especially close to my mom when in church, with music and the lyrical lessons I learn in life being brought up with her love, attention. She was my spiritual leader. Dad was God fearing and grateful but had too many irons in the fire. Mom really worked at strenghtening her faith and radiated a goodness, a joy that was from the Lord. She got me, my brothers on the right path for life spiritually. Her death showed her never ending dedication to the Lord. No fear or struggles, worries until the very end due to her unending, undying faith. She taught us all so much.
While mom was making a Sunday dinner after church, Dad would be reading the weekend paper and listening on the stereo to Robert Goulet, Arty Shaw, Bennie Goodman, Glen Miller or the Ray Conniff Singers in the farm home front room. The same room my brothers would be playing the Beatles, Rolling Stones, Cream, Animals, Chuck Berry depending on their mood during school home work study the rest of the week evenings.
In the same room, I took piano lessons on a Story and Clark model brand new from Robinson Music. Lesson for two dollars a week from Greta White from Oakfield. I can see her with a pencil in her teeth as she played something I was suppose to master before next week’s lesson. I took organ lessons too in the summer at the Episcopal and Court Street Baptist church. There is something very sacred, special being in a church all alone and playing music.
If you have been away from church, get back in to the pews.
See what you are missing and desperately need. Every day. From the start at a baptismal fount and then for the rest of your life. Think of it as important as air, water, food, sleep. Don’t get out of the habit. When you take a break, are prayerless, nothing good happens in your life. Your faith in something outside yourself, a higher power is the key to all your successes or when you struggle during the set backs everyone has. Music is one special ministry.
My Aunt Ruth was a music teacher who had no kids of her own yet one thousand that thought of her, relied on her like a Mom. My brother Stephen played in a variety of Bangor Maine music bands too and it was always fun to sit down front, dance, laugh and watch him boogie woogie. Help people forget about their problems which he always reminded the crowd to leave those at the door. I have good brothers.
Brother Stephen’s philosophy for the next few hours it was going to be fun, a time to let your hair down, cut the rug.
And to remember to tip your waitress who was working hard to do her part in the musical experience. He was quite the showman and came by his skills naturally growing up in a household of music.
In high school I had the lead in Tom Sawyer, other musicals and All Aroostook, All State performances kept me busy, out of trouble. Our kids in a musical town like Houlton Maine did the same in show, jazz choir competitions around New England. Working in Maine radio starting at fourteen in Houlton then Bangor taught me well how important music of all kinds is to people’s lives. Music can fill you with the Holy Spirit, help you through joyful and not so much fun but right on time, needed life events.
For more out of your life, you have to be willing to trust others, open yourself up to those around you.
Not be self contained, trying to do it all yourself. Don’t carry the weight of the world, learn to say no in serving others, your community too. Pace yourself and as my mom would remind, “Andrew, moderation”. Sing a song, dance, enjoy life and don’t be so serious.
Even though your parents die, they still talk to you and you to them. If you spent a lot of time with them like I did, my kids did growing up. If you are local to them you know them very well. And what they shared with you stays with you. It is okay to ask for help, to share more of you. To become more available, an open book outside and inside your home. Be one person who admits their mistakes, shows his struggles through testimonials to improve and the need for others to come along side in the process. And to be a servant to others to help them in the same way.
The focus in your life can be lost, misplaced but your attitude, your sails can be adjusted once you see what is missing.
Where correction is needed, your efforts need to be doubled up. Slowing down, being freed up with an empty nest makes the over due inside over haul the priority for me. To improve physical, mental, spiritual health should always be the goal. Not shelved for something else. Keep your eyes on your own paper and avoid comparisons too. You have skills, talents and may just have low self esteem, lack self confidence because you are busy watching, listening to others.
Slowing down, shifting priorities as your life situation changes is a healthy adjustment. It’s your life. Work on you. Expect more from yourself than others. Keep you eyes on your own paper. Discover your hidden talents, skills, abilities for service to others. Watch your self confidence, esteem increase. Tied to the time you spend on your knees. Dependent proportionately to the amount of your day you set aside to get in to the word. To be fed. To work on you one on one.
Alone is not bad and what you need as you search for answers to prayers.
Make good use of the time alone. And you will get those answers one by one if you just ask. Develop humility, discernment and learn to surrender so you can. Be faithful to the one who made you, your manufacturer. He does good work. Is the only one that can “fix what ails you”. To get, keep you on track. Who exposes your weaknesses, why you stumble and guides you, provides your true joy. He is the salt, light needed to find your true worth and purpose in life. The greatest miracle is for those around you to see whoa, what is going on inside you… and they want some too. Don’t keep it a secret. Lead them from where you were to where you are now.
Maine, still waters, natural uncrowded places to heal, learn your purpose, find your inner joy and peace.
The couple both agreed if either wanted children after they married that they would start a family.
Just one decisive vote all it would take. All that would be needed both pledged, promised. But during dating many things are like being on school summer vacation easy.
Shortly after each said I do, the husband said I don’t, won’t father our child. He did not want kids and that was that. The door closed, nailed shut on the subject. That marriage issue, hurdle and disagreement meant the hard work of a real school year was in session, underway. Like a surprise quiz or test you were not prepared for suddenly announced. Causing a pit in your stomach about any other surprises ahead in the marriage. The honeymoon was over.
Neither had thought they wanted to have kids during dating because they had married late.
But the biological clock was still ticking, healthy and the wife especially was so good with kids. But had never had any. I knew as a kid I wanted kids and that that was one of my purposes in life. To be a parent, raise a bunch the better part of two decades until empty nest syndrome kicked in. And all kinds of free time was created to fill with new life pursuits, hobbies, relationship self improvement.
I got a call from a man claiming to be my cousin. A child in the family no one knew about, that did not show up in any of the photo albums, the reunion conversations. The son of my great uncle and aunt that I always knew as childless, also marrying late. And both long gone, dead and buried.
That call out of the blue coming in right on schedule hit me oddly at first.
The knee jerk response, instinct was no. Can’t be. No kids in my memories of the pair. But logic said hear him out. Listen to the story and see if it is plausible, possible.
The new cousin was a man in his seventies, living on the Maine coast. He was blessed with four girls of his own. Had carried the secret of his real parents for approaching four score. And as he closed in on his death, the end of his life, he wanted two things. To know the health history of my great aunt and uncle, his parents.
My great uncle was a diabetic that did not take care of the disease even though his wife, my great aunt was a cracker jack nurse.
This new cousin wanted to tell his daughters the secret, the family health history of their real grandparents. He had one daughter with diabetes.
At first, my new elderly cousin believed his real mother, my great aunt was his aunt. Called her that growing up. His mother could not conceive a child, my great aunt had found herself pregnant back in the 1930’s. A picklish condition and one that I don’t think my great uncle ever knew about during courting and sparking. That might have upset the marital to be apple cart in the pursuit. When he was her initiative.
My great aunt was a world war one nurse and made several trips here, there on “assignments”. So heading to Braintree Massachusetts to work at a hospital where she was needed for nine months, a little under a year did not seem out of the ordinary to anyone in her family in the Houlton Maine area. Nurses went where duty called, traveled like doctors who used to make house calls too. They would stay with the sick, run the house, keep things in order until the infirmed were back on their feet. Feeling in the pink.
I scanned, emailed tons of images of my great aunt and uncle and my new bonafide second cousin did the same from his end of himself.
His birth certificate was witnessed by one of my great aunt’s best friends, Alfreda Rooney from Ludlow Maine. The names of the principles were creatively altered but you could see the logic leading to what the paperwork revealed.
My parents came to the real estate office, Both studied the images he had kindly emailed me and both exclaimed how much he looked at this age like one or the other of his real parents. No DNA swabs, paternity tests or grave exhumations needed. Nothing high profile or filled with drama or notariety of the players in this paternity issue. No high skates legal suit with lots of billable hours. It was simple. I had a new cousin, welcome aboard my attitude. Family is everything I was taught, shown growing up.
No financial gain motivation, just wanting to get the secret off his chest before he died.
To let his kids, my new four third cousins know their real heritage, lineage. He had known his real mother as his Aunt for the better part of his life until his mother let him in on the secret before her passing. Wonder how many other similiar secrets went to the grave in the families, neighbors around me?
My new cousin and I exchange Christmas cards. My parents who are both gone now when alive invited him north to visit. He never did with them but called me one day for assistance in finding my great aunt and uncle’s grave stone. I helped him and told him everything I knew, that was shared with me about his parents.
When I told him my cousin Perry and I were two cousins she seemed to be especially fond of, and how much fun my great aunt was, what a tease I heard my great uncle was, he seemed troubled. Did not share the joys, fond memories and told me his real mother create problems for him that he was still struggling with as he admitted to the world what not everyone would share as the best action to take.
It was bittersweet like many stepping stones, set backs, and trials we all have in life.
No one is immune. What is your family secret? Have you come to terms, grips with it? Do you keep it under tight wraps? Ashamed, embarrassed or empowered with it to be stronger because of it. To use it for good or just the sheer freedom to admit and not carry it around.
Loving someone is like that.
Don’t ever try to smother it, hide it, let them know even if that love is not returned, if the other side of the signal gave up on you, the us. Because you waited too long. It feels good to tell the truth in matters of the heart. Regardless of the outcome. Swallow your pride. Everyone needs someone to lean on sometime in life. When you are not strong, when you need someone to carry on. It is never too late as long as you are alive. There is always a morning after the storm.
I don’t believe my great uncle ever knew he was this retired fellow from Rockland Maine’s father. Swept under the rug, kept tight lipped by the few that knew that never spilled the beans. Until the boy’s supposedly mother told the truth of who really was. Would the truth hurt someone, cause more problems for others?
Be ready for your call, keep an open mind, and invite in any new family members you may have. Family, kids are one of God’s most important institutions. Cherish yours. Embrace and hold them close through the peaks and valleys of your life.
Maine, big state, down to Earth people who keep it simple, real, honest.
Are you a feelings driven person or someone who thinks, ponders, arrives at conclusions slowly, carefully?
And then acts on the course best suited that matches the choices in the situation at hand? Recognize your talents, skills, purpose even if those you love do not. Learn your unique abilities, especially the ones hidden, dormant, not stretched or developed.
Sometimes It’s A Simple Case Of Start Living, Or Start Dying.
Be glad people come in more than thirty one flavors. That they are different than you and me. Embrace those differences, don’t consider them liabillities. Or hold them back. Accept another person’s insecurities, love them more for them when you see their struggle to improve. That they need your help and you can offer them a hand, shoulder to lean on. We need each other. Recognize your limitations, keep coloring within the lines. See God’s plan for your life.
Maybe you are over due for a “life review”.
Open up your heart, make the time to look deep within yourself. Something you will like, will surprise you. Other darkness, thorns will help explain the shape you have. Where you need improvement. God can empower you to be more, live healthier, and do great things for those around you. Don’t just exist, coast, be apathetic or self centered. Live outside yourself and open your eyes, ears, heart and soul. Make your life fruitfull. Avoid exaggerations, resist comparisions between other people and yourself.
Make the most with what you have been given to work with. Discover your many hidden talents, your self worth that might be a little low. Develop your potential that you are loaded with but maybe blind to see and realize. I have learned to remember, always keep my eyes on my own paper. To work at changing me for the better, not worrying about where others need adjustment. I can only change me.
Keep a spiritual journal, don’t waste any peaks, valleys, twists or turns you are taken through. Glean, squeeze out the knowledge, learn more about yourself in the process. Get on, stay on your knees and looking up for direction, much needed guidance.
Maine is a great place for the space you need to do this. Beautiful surroundings, friendly people but not overpopulated. Spread out and not jammed in. Get here quick as you can.
Maine Restaurant And Brick Commercial Building For Sale In Houlton ME
Maine is famous for success stories. It is still a place where if you have a good idea, a passion to create something from thin air, anything is possible with hard work, dedication.
Joyce Transue’s culinary talent is well known and over the last fourteen years Southern Aroostook County has benefited greatly from her efforts in the kitchen. Hank her carpenter husband and daughter Emily have worked as a team to transform a classic downtown brick building in to a thriving Maine restaurant business. Come meet them in person! Tour the operation, ask lots of questions. Sellers will train.
And good news, if you are looking to tie on an apron, are good dealing with the public, like to cook and create an atmosphere that is memorable, fun, fulfilling. The Courtyard Cafe and Garden Bar is for sale. Take the video tour of this Houlton Maine business.
Maine Restaurant For Sale Houlton ME Video
Buy a job, maybe this is the carrot to get you to finally act on the dream to live, work, play in Maine. Be honest, if you are one of the eight out of ten people who live in a city, urban area. Are you feeling safe, have the elbow room and space you desire to be happy? No? Bail out, move, relocate to Maine. The way life should be.
Consider seriously owning, running and making what you are worth with a Maine business property listing.
The sense of satisfaction of taking a well run fourteen year strong Maine business and taking it to the next level will be rewarding, satisfying.
Develop the second floor that can be three rental offices and a landlord’s efficiency apartment. Enjoy income from two store fronts that create extra traffic for your business. This happy couple, family have done a first class job creating from scratch a thriving, healthy fun restaurant business.
Maine Has Extreme Beauty, Get Outdoors in Vacationland.
Let’s face it, meeting someone that you agree with 100 percent with all the time is not realistic.
And who would want to date, marry your twin, a clone, someone identical? A person different than you broadens you, comes in to a relationship with expertise, talents, experiences you lack in lots of areas. And can improve you. And you do likewise if you can adopt effective ways to deal with conflict resolution. Look, embrace those differences. List the good rather than what the other person lacks that you wished they had.
The couple that says we never fight, disagree, argue.
Whoa. If there is a healthy input from both sides to achieve unity, oneness more often than not, there is going to be a bit of tug of war until both share the same vision of the final output in decision making. Decisions that involve both members of the relationship. Not strong armed or coerced in to agreement or by default, just whatever you want to do to avoid an argument.
Maine’s Peaceful Setting Better For Conflict Resolutions
Surrender is a powerful skill in a relationship. So are words of affirmation, encouragement. The ability to deal with conflict constructively along with effective communication are probably the two single most important skills to learn to have a peaceful, happier relationship. Makes sense. So why is it so hard to accomplish on a regular basis?
Since we are all different, and differences are not deficiencies, then the communication, the conflict resolution styles vary too.
But there are still some patterns to adopt to make the family home a healthier place without the tension, confusion or tip toe silence of resentment out of frustration happening. Which hurts the entire household, family that does not feel safe and secure in that kind of environment. Or for a more successful career, life outside the home and in the world that reminds you no man is an island. We need to get along, learn from each other.
Here is a site that covers some of the building blocks of conflict resolution. Respect for each other is essential to keep a two way back and forth of constructive communication to work toward resolution.
So understanding the process, knowing your strengths and weakness before battle field conditions are set up and cross fire happens. Before the zing of sniping ricochets around you is a good idea. If you want the relationship to last, to be deep, rich and lasting. All that it can be.
Compromise and meeting half way sounds easy enough.
But when suddenly a line in the sand is drawn, a do or die situation unfolds that is life and death important, being relaxed, solution oriented can go out the window. And instead of the knock down drag out. A lot of why something seemingly so small becomes so big is due to the stress release of hormones, the same kind used in caveman days when it was eat or be eaten.
Cortisol, Norepinephrine are two of those stress hormones. Health problems happen from too much stress and learning how to cope, avoid and understand conflict resolution can mean you stay on top of the Earth longer. Not buried six feet under.
It is good to be a good provider, but relationships around you are more important than your labor.
What you do to go beyond meeting the basic needs of a family. Being able to shut off work, take vacations, relax once you have enough saved for the rainy day is key.
Starting out, you may have had to scrimp, save, work an extra job to make ends meet. But there comes a time to open up the financial ledger, realize hey, you can ease it back a notch. You have savings, things paid for and it is time to have more fun as the kids leave the nest. For the better part of two decades, kids do take a priority and should not be neglected. And when you work at a job you love, you never work a day in your life. Passion in both is key. But relationships with the one you loved should not take a back seat, get short changed in over book lifestyles of busyness. Collecting stuff, things.
Could you when things were calm, easy going be able to discuss what you did like, were not as wild about each other? To exchange the list without anyone getting defensive or being wrong? Because everyone likes something different about other people right? Not to change the person but to help the other person know what to be sensitive about.
But remembering how you react to others is even more important to letting them be who they are. Understanding why they are shaped today that way. But together, subtle, slow improvements for the good of the relationship can happen if both work to polish the rough spots to bring two entirely different people closer together in to one solid partnership.
But what if you and your mate were carbon copies.
All fine and dandy right? No, differences can broaden a person and stretch, allow both to grow if they are embraced, celebrated. Be glad no one is just like you, one is enough and none of us is perfect. But maybe in a relationship, two joining forces are way better than each alone would ever be.
It is normal to disagree, discuss, come up with solutions and better communication tools together. And for each to compromise at times. You can disagree and it does open up the conversation and better communication can happen as long as no one is threatened by something different they initially believed right? Can you compromise, not always have to be right? If not why? Explore that and easier relationships can happen.
Can you apologize if you say something too sharply? Or admit that what you don’t want to hear from the other applies, is right when you consider it without anger? Even say you have been kind to point that out, that is was helpful to me? Stand up for your beliefs and not have to back down too.
You can be strong minded, not a whimp but sometimes having a strong viewpoint once in a while can be useful to seeing, accepting the other person’s point of view. Then adding that to your own and coming up with an even better idea or thought jointly.
Or maybe if people don’t have disagreements, if people don’t argue or disagree ever, they are too much alike. Which sounds like a good thing but is it no fun being married to your twin, someone too much alike. Too predicable or neither one can make a decision, take a different approach to life decisions.
Also, using the terms “always”, “never” to really broad brush the other in the relationship is not going to help unity.
Is not true because it is never that extreme right? You and I have a role in how good the solution goes or poorly. You and I need to take ownership that maybe we are not the easiest to live with, and there is plenty of room for improvement.
I need to keep my eyes on my paper, work on my assignment, half of the relationship to be the best I can be running all the communication, actions through God first. It takes time, you can not be hurried or too busy with kids, jobs, something else.
Or ignore the process of conflict resolution, studying the unique dynamic of the two of you when you communicate. Skip all of the study or home work together and soon oh oh, problems ahead. You want to get closer to your mate not run away, or push them away right? I never thought it through that fully either. Don’t feel bad.
Moderation, priorities, not letting things build up and keeping everything in balance has to happen.
Having God at the forefront of your life needs to be part of your plan for richer, more enjoyable living. Is it? Maine, the place to figure things out with less people, more outdoor beauty and natural settings. Less fights more outdoor fun happens in Maine.
